So let’s call it as it is: I lied. In truth, I had every intention of writing something at least once a week, but I failed miserably when certain aspects of life (work) took over. Spoiler alert: I’ve never struck a good balance.
But here we are. God’s honest truth, I’m currently in a low swing and frankly have no motivstion to write even this. But we press on. “NCIS” has been playing on my Netflix account for a couple months and S14e13 smacked me over the head: “When you’re going through hell, keep going.” And that’s more or less what we do. I mean, the majority of us believe all things are temporary, right? Nothing in life, inclufing the life itself is permanent, right? I never joined the vampire camp, deluded with the ideals of immortality. Quite the opposite – I want to die. I mean, not like, right now, but yeah, I don’t want to live forever. Not only am I already over it, but I tend to waste a lot of time as it is already, what the hell all would I do for eternity? Screw that. Okay, let me get back on track.
Right. So, there’s a lot to catch up on. Unfortunately, depression literally warps your brain. While you have no motivation to document your life, the chemical deficiencies also prohibit your recollection. I don’t know where to start, but usually when I take a hiatus from my diary, I do massive catch-ups by subject. I will stay consistent with that method, I will post subject by subject, one at a time, from wheever I can rememver to the current day. It’s like if GRRM woke up from a similar five and half month slumber and decided to finally fucking get on with it.
I’m with you, friends, hiatus sucks. But also please believe me when I say procrastinators such as myself experience their own individual forms of guilt and/or punishment. You don’t have to curse us, we’re already doing that in the background for you. Besides, this blog has like, two followers. I have not stressed a single second about you poor souls, clinging to the screen, being tortured by my absence instead of living your lives (because I am 400% convinced you didn’t even notice when it stopped updating).
So here it goes… The Great Big Catch Up of 2020 begins now.
hmmm… maybe I should’ve drawn a little bobble for such an occassion? I’ll put it on the to-do list. Just wait.